Make Time for the Good Life Together
Posted on: August 31, 2017
Good-Life Activities for Your Family
By Gina Shaw
FROM THE WEBMD ARCHIVES
You may have heard it on the news or morning talk shows: Have dinner together as a family often. There’s even a national initiative, Family Day, that reminds parents “what your kids really want at the dinner table is you.” Studies have found that kids who have frequent family dinners are less likely to use alcohol, tobacco, or drugs. But it’s not just about the food, say experts: it’s about the connection.
Whether you’re eating dinner, going for a nature walk, or holding a family karaoke night, spending time together builds healthy families and healthy kids. “If you grew up in a healthy family that did these things, it makes intuitive sense to you: this is what glues families together,” says Meg Cox, author of The Book of New Family Traditions: How to Create Great Rituals for Holidays & Everyday. “It’s about a sense of connection, of being loved, a sense of identity and security that runs very deep.”
What family activities can you do with your kids to build those essential connections? The sky’s the limit! To get started with some fun family activities, try these tips from Cox and Lawrence Cohen, PhD, clinical psychologist and author of Playful Parenting.
Family Fun With Food
Play “conversation in a jar” (or basket, or bin). Keep a container on the dinner table with blank slips of paper, and whenever you think of a cool question, write it down and toss it in. Some examples from Cox: “What’s something you can do better than your parents?” “If there were a holiday named after you, how would people celebrate it?” “Make up a nickname for everyone at the table — nothing mean!” Once a week, use some of the questions in the basket to spark conversations at dinner.
Shake it up. Every so often, have a wacky family dinner night. “Sometimes we’ll eat with the big serving utensils, use serving platters instead of plates, and drink out of big pitchers instead of cups,” says Cohen. Or you can put food coloring in everything and make goofy food. Or just serve dinner as a picnic, on a blanket in the living room or playroom. WebMD Feature | Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD on June 29, 2010 Sources SOURCES: National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, Columbia University, New York.
Have a “reading dinner.” Choose a book and read aloud while you eat. If your kids are old enough, they can take a turn. “I think the reason my kids ate all their vegetables when they were younger is that the rule was, you have to keep eating if I’m going to read!” says Cox.
Enjoy special food outings. Have a regular, simple ritual, like going for ice cream after dinner once a week, or walking to the farmer’s market on Saturday morning. Cook together as a family. Even the youngest child can help in the kitchen by pouring or stirring. “Just remember, it’s about the process, not getting to the outcome,” says Cohen. “It’ll probably take you longer to make the cookies than if you made them yourself, and the kitchen will get a lot messier. But if you tell them to stop and let you do it because they’re making a mess, you’ve blown it. It’s about time together.”
Invite friends to a monthly “soup night.” This is about more than just your family — it’s about connecting with a community of friends. On soup night — maybe the first Saturday of every month? — make a huge pot of chili or stew and let it be known that friends are welcome to drop by with a bottle of wine or a loaf of bread. “Having things like that, that sense of community, lets kids grow up in a place where they feel safe,” says Cox. “They know there are other adults who will look after them.”
Family Exercise and Outdoor Play
Introduce your child to a sport you love. Whether it’s yoga or ice skating, fishing or biking, almost no child is too young to be at least a small part of your favorite activity. “If it’s something the parent loves, the parent’s enthusiasm will make it fun,” says Cohen.
Go for family walks together. If you think your child will be bored with a simple walk, try Cox’s trick: storytelling walks. “We’d make up stories together — for example, after the movie ‘Toy Story,’ we’d imagine what our sons’ toys would do while we were gone,” she says. “We’d make up elaborate scenarios about which one would get lost, which ones would help find him, and so on.”
Make up indoor versions of outdoor games. “Thank goodness we never destroyed anything, but we did do indoor soccer in the front hall,” Cox says. WebMD Feature | Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD on June 29, 2010.
National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse, Columbia University, New York.
Meg Cox, author, The Book of New Family Traditions: How to Create Great Rituals for Holidays & Everyday, Princeton, N.J.